In my previous blogpost 5 Russian Meals English Will Never Dare To Try I was talking about weird Russian food. This time, let’s mock & troll some ridicilous British cookery creations. Not only Russian cuisine should be considered as the objects of butt, there are plenty of the British dishes which tickles my throat just by a quick glance.
Let’s smash it:
1. Deep Fried Mars Bars
Seriously? Cooking Mars bars in batter? Sinking already extremely fat chocolate bars into the bowl of the figure enemy? What a Scottish perversion. This is a real caloriс bomb for your body. In Russian, the saying goes “isn’t your butt going to stick together”?
If You Dare Find The Recipe Here
2. Haggis
Meet the traditional Scottish sausage made from a sheep’s stomach stuffed with diced sheep’s liver, lungs and heart, oatmeal, onion, suet and seasoning. Yum-yum! What a shame I’ve never tried that one.
If You Dare Find The Recipe Here
3. Black Pudding
Who does like the taste of blood? Vampires and the British do. Black pudding is an Irish dish, to prepare which people add “4 cups fresh pig’s blood”. Faugh!
If you will ever spot a person eating Black Pudding – don’t hesitate to take out some garlic to banish the devil!
If You Dare Find The Recipe Here
4. Periwinkles
No comment.
If You Dare Find The Recipe Here
5. Jellied Eels
My favourite one. Looks like Londoners are not very particular in terms of the food choice and recipes.
Looks delicious, doesn’t it? I would rather name it “Fish Under The Slime”.
If You Dare Find The Recipe Here
6. Laverbead
Welsh Green Snot – the best food inventory ever. Even though, the British can consider some Russian food quite extraordinary and throw-up-like, this one wins the disgustingness competition beyond comparison just by the way it looks like.
If You Dare Find The Recipe Here
“To eat well in England you should have breakfast three times a day.” – W. Somerset Maugham
After exploring some of the traditional British meals, I totally agree with the saying. Of course, they might taste beautiful, but I – as a true Russian – do not have balls to try them. Don’t want to die due to my cultural curiosity.
Brits & Russkies 
I actually think a good haggis and properly made black pudding are delicious. Not the cheap stuff of course, but really well made haggis and black pudding are amazing. Black pudding is similar to krovyanka kolbasa. We also make a blood soup during the season. Prdelačka has a Slovak name but is still popular in Hungary as well. In Winter we used to slaughter a pig and all parts would be used, including the blood. No longer allowed to do so unfortunately.
But…I agree with you on the other dishes.
I meant that the description of the components used for the preparation of those meals doesn’t sound very appetising! As the saying goes, “there is no accounting for taste” 🙂
You should try haggis – it is spicy and delicious. There is also a vegetarian haggis available. It is widely eaten on and around 25th January when the Scots celebrate the birthday of their national poet, Robert Burns. Try – be brave!
I will do at some point due to my curiosity, I just feel sorry for sheep and his stomach 😀
Very good blog, I have try few of this meals, black pudding very good, Jellied Eels is nice as well. Suppose it similar to many russians meals. Yes it looks not very delicious but very tasty!!
Thanks you, Maks, for a feedback and your opinion! Happy that you liked my blog x
Reblogged this on Jörgen Hartogs and commented:
6 British Meals Russians Will Never Eat
Haggis isn’t that bad. Jellied Eels? If you serve them to me, I will throw them at you. The black pudding is again, not too bad. It’s probably an acquired taste. Deep Fried Mars Bars are great, but they will kill your waistline if you’re a person who gains weight. It’s a lot of calories to burn, so don’t go there often. I like mine split down the middle served on a soft serve ice cream bed, drizzled with honey.