6 British Meals Russians Will Never Eat

In my previous blogpost 5 Russian Meals English Will Never Dare To Try I was talking about weird Russian food. This time, let’s  mock & troll some ridicilous British cookery creations. Not only Russian cuisine should be considered as the objects of butt, there are plenty of the British dishes which tickles my throat just by a quick glance.

Let’s smash it:

1. Deep Fried Mars Bars


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Seriously? Cooking Mars bars in batter? Sinking already extremely fat chocolate bars into the bowl of the figure enemy? What a Scottish perversion. This is a real caloriс bomb for your body. In Russian, the saying goes “isn’t your butt going to stick together”?

If You Dare Find The Recipe Here

2. Haggis


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Meet the traditional Scottish sausage made from a sheep’s stomach stuffed with diced sheep’s liver, lungs and heart, oatmeal, onion, suet and seasoning. Yum-yum! What a shame I’ve never tried that one.

If You Dare Find The Recipe Here

3. Black Pudding


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Who does like the taste of blood? Vampires and the British do. Black pudding is an Irish dish, to prepare which people add “4 cups fresh pig’s blood”. Faugh!

If you will ever spot a person eating Black Pudding – don’t hesitate to take out some garlic to banish the devil!

If You Dare Find The Recipe Here

4. Periwinkles

Entrance of a sea snail's house with living sea snail within. Veddö naturreservat, Sweden 2005.

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No comment.

If You Dare Find The Recipe Here

5. Jellied Eels


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My favourite one. Looks like Londoners are not very particular in terms of the food choice and recipes.

Looks delicious, doesn’t it?  I would rather name it “Fish Under The Slime”.

If You Dare Find The Recipe Here

6. Laverbead


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Welsh Green Snot – the best food inventory ever. Even though, the British can consider some Russian food quite extraordinary and throw-up-like, this one wins the disgustingness competition beyond comparison just by the way it looks like.

If You Dare Find The Recipe Here

“To eat well in England you should have breakfast three times a day.” – W. Somerset Maugham

After exploring some of the traditional British meals, I totally agree with the saying. Of course, they might taste beautiful, but I – as a true Russian – do not have balls to try them. Don’t want to die due to my cultural curiosity.

9 thoughts on “6 British Meals Russians Will Never Eat

  1. I actually think a good haggis and properly made black pudding are delicious. Not the cheap stuff of course, but really well made haggis and black pudding are amazing. Black pudding is similar to krovyanka kolbasa. We also make a blood soup during the season. Prdelačka has a Slovak name but is still popular in Hungary as well. In Winter we used to slaughter a pig and all parts would be used, including the blood. No longer allowed to do so unfortunately.

    But…I agree with you on the other dishes.

  2. You should try haggis – it is spicy and delicious. There is also a vegetarian haggis available. It is widely eaten on and around 25th January when the Scots celebrate the birthday of their national poet, Robert Burns. Try – be brave!

  3. Very good blog, I have try few of this meals, black pudding very good, Jellied Eels is nice as well. Suppose it similar to many russians meals. Yes it looks not very delicious but very tasty!!

  4. Haggis isn’t that bad. Jellied Eels? If you serve them to me, I will throw them at you. The black pudding is again, not too bad. It’s probably an acquired taste. Deep Fried Mars Bars are great, but they will kill your waistline if you’re a person who gains weight. It’s a lot of calories to burn, so don’t go there often. I like mine split down the middle served on a soft serve ice cream bed, drizzled with honey.

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